Thems the Breaks

Write about a time you broke…

A Bone

Technically, I don’t think I’ve ever broken a bone. However, I have had plenty of serious injuries. The closest thing to a broken bone is when I separated my ribs from my sternum playing rugby.

I was playing Center, instead of my usual Scrumhalf position. It was open field and instead of scooping up the ball, I squatted and got rolled. I ended up on the bottom of growing pile. My neck got hyper-extended and my chin got shoved into my chest. Then, everything went black. I thought my neck snapped. Fortunately, I could still walk, but it felt like someone had pushed my head into my chest cavity.

For the next couple weeks, my sternum would buckle in and out, like a pop can. I was on a plane to Rhode Island a couple weeks later and as descended, the pressure on my ribs knocked the wind out of me. I couldn’t get it to pop back out until we were back on the ground.

The first practice back one of my teammates asked, “what happened to you” and punched me in the chest. I folded like a house of cards and he shook his hand like a wet rag.

To this day, I still have to “reset” my ribs with a good yawn every now and then. If you listen closely, you can hear a little “crunch.”

The Law

I’m not especially proud of this, but here it goes. My college roommate had an air rifle. I was putzing around with it and pointed it out the window of our 3rd floor room. Without thinking, I just pulled the trigger. Pffffoot went the BB.It didn’t ricochet. The passenger window of car parked in front of the house just turned into a million tiny pieces and poof, it was gone.

I quietly put the gun back where I found it and left the room. That was the last I heard about that and this is the first time I ever mentioned it to anyone else.

Boiling down

So today’s writing suggestion are as follows:

  1. Boil down Hamlet to a Tweet
  2. Tweet the plot of Star Wars
  3. Tweet my life story
  4. Tweet my day so far

1. I hate people who assume everyone has read “Hamlet”. I don’t even pretend to like or give a shit about Shakespeare. Like most Americans born past 1776, I come to his work by way of some new, and usually better twist of the original, like West Side Story, 10 Things I Hate About You, or Scrubs.

This summer we went to a Shakespeare in the park event. We even saw Hamlet, and I can’t for the life of me figure out how anyone gets what in the hell is going on. Maybe I was just restless, because I can’t sit that long on the ground.

So no, I can’t summarize the plot in a 140 character Tweet. instead, I’ll write it’s most famous line in Twitterese; “2b or not 2b”.

2. The plot of Star Wars; “Die Hard for Retards”.

3. My life story; “Uselessly ahead of the curve.”

4. My day so far: I’m already ahead at getting behind.